On The Topic Of Hot Women: and how much I can love them - THESE ARE THE DAYS OF OUR LIVES

Monday, December 24, 2012

On The Topic Of Hot Women: and how much I can love them

SAY HELLO to the girl of my dreams....




no, i'm not a lessie and at this point in my life I really don't think I'm bi either bc I love the penis too mch.. honestly. but if looked like Amanda sefried i'd have to like become a lesbian just so i could make it with myself n the mirror every time I looked into it.

SOOOO, you might be wondering about the topic of this blog.. especially if you are a male.. writing about girl's sexuality has been on my mind lately bc it seems to have become like a fad to be bi or just straight out gay lately, as if it were a decision. SO, i have dedicated exactly 1/3 of this post to each of my favorite girls in the world (okay this is minus Kate and Edie OBVIOUSLY) so I don't feel left out. I've also dedicated one song to each so the post can read somewhat like a middle school dance esp bc the one dedicated to Amanda is Unchained Melody.

Amanda, You've gotten so much hotter since Mean Girls even tho that was the first time i remember seeing your sexy face.. You did ditzy blonde girls everywhere a favor. I don't even know what I would do if we got to hook up bc i'd feel too weird touching your giant boobs and everything abt your face is perfect I wouldn't wan tot mess anything up.. basically I want to be you but if I did i'd be so turned on by myself i'd prob have an orgasm that would make me explode.. literally.







Lara Stone, 

When I first saw your naked swimsuit pictures in UK Vogue 3 summers ago I fell in love w your body bc you re so fucking hot but have curves in all the right places. plus I noticed we are the same age which clearly gave me (false) hope that I could somehow someday be as hot and confident as you .. I also love that you wore two dresses to your wedding and that you ended up in rehab for alcohol just like i did.. kinda. I wanna feel you up and be your best friend. We could have sleep overs and try on all your Free CK underwear you get from your campaign. While I wouldn't have a lot to bring to the relationship I could def bitch out anyone who said you look like stupid Georgia May Jagger. I'm glad you have a husband so things wouldn't get too serious c you're so exotic and fucking rad looking I might have to bring you around forever just for attention's sake. When it comes down to it I'm just insanely shallow and I adore your because you are beautiful. I don't even fucking know anything abt Lara Stone's personality.... and prob will never meet this sexy kitten.. But that doesn't mean I can't love her/you now.. sopooooYou get  Marina song bc she has the prettiest voice and you have the prettiest mouth and breasts. Calvin chose well when he picked you for his underwear campaign







Gemma Ward,  

You look like you came form another, far better more ethereal planet where I want to be transported with you. you seriously look like an angel. I love you even more for going from a fucKing 0 to a regular size (6) IN YOUR 20's like a normal human being+ while you were mourning the loss of a recent boyfriend (I have been going down.. not up on the scale) It's nice to know someone as beautiful as you can have actual problems. Fuck them, there WON'T be another GEMMA WARD! Again, here comes my vanity, Gemma ward is like no one else you've ever seen before. all her features are make her like unwordly- which is why shes ncknamed the china doll. Well fuck, I can't imagine if you went up 4 stupid pant sizes your unearthly like features would diminish any lesss. So I'd still def have a huge crush on her no matter how fat she was... *wait- I take that back.. of course you can be too fat- but e aren't talking like muffin top here* Anyway, back to third person like the psycho I am.. Gemma, you get Fiona bc bitch knows what its like to deal with some fucked up shit.. and in your case have it publicised all over the bitchy fashion world. No matter what you'll always be that 14 year old alien looking girl I saw fell in  love w/ the first time I saw your pic. obvi beauty is inside and out. P.S. This song kills it... muah. I love you Fiona Apple!!!!!



So it looks lke I have the same basic taste, Long blonde hair, big boobs, interesting features. The thing is I have had some serious to not so serious lessie experiences and I just am not into girls that way something about the whole paraphernalia down there is just not sexual to me... But  yet I find them insanely hot. Guys are insanely sexy too.. but often not as hot as girls and guys rarely have that sort of... je ne sais quoi. Its also hard bc threesomes are no fun.. in my opinion.. probably because if i'm not the center of attention i'll make sure nO ONE is. muahahahah. But its just that I desire the manliness of a... man... I am completely brain dead tonight.. sorry.

Anyway, if you have a ton of girl crushes like me but thnk you're actually a lessie take this redic quiz I found online. hahahah I love it. why are people on this planet are so fucking bizarre. Anyway, I just tried to look on the Internet for some feminist articles arguing that women are just the more physically attractive sex.. but came up w/ a lot of weird shit  didn't even want to explore.. Wow, the Internet is scary sometimes.


Okay so those are my girls.. and now it is.. Time to go masturbate to Kid Cudi... or Currently Unknown.. love currently unknown. Yea, fuck off, I can crave a penis just as much as a pretty blonde fce. especially a hot black rapper. YUM.  I think I might even throw some of my new found morals out the window for that fantasy...

anyway, enough talk.

All my love and sweet dreams,
E



p.s. questions, comments and any feedback on this topic definitely welcome! I feel like its kinda taboo to have so many girl crushes. But fuck it, I do.








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