Friday, March 22, 2013

COACHELLA: and how I won't be there + other coveted items

Dear Readers,

It is that time of year when i go into a deep depression because I will not be attending Coachella yet again. And obvi not ONLY for the music.

Coachella embodies all that I want to be when I wear my sexy "festival" clothes. aka cut offs that don't exist and some see thru tank w/ my hair not- did.


not to mention all the famous pretty people i'll be missing in their "natural environment". I hope I make it thru this time.


No, its okay. The line-up kinda sucks. (sorry for all the David Bowie fans, but he's hella old now) Ghostland Observatory "give me the beat" makes up for most everything though. If that doesn't put you in the mood... well, i'm sorry.

OTHER THINGS I NOW LOVE afer an un-needed stroll through both SAKS and bloomies:


I NEED THIS DRESS: WELL, first i need to lose like 10 lbs.. THEn. i need to wear this dress everyday this summer... wait.. no.... first i need to lose 10 lbs then i need some gorgeous new shoes... THEN. I need to wear this dress everyday this summer.


He is now one of my favorite designers. EVER.

2) any dress from RED VALENTINO. I didn't even know this brand existed. Look at these dresses: how much cuter could they possibly be? ANSWER: Like... none cuter. 

Plus VALENTINO reminds me of that part in Gossip Girl when little J is a retard and like steals one of her friend's mom's dresses to pawn it for another hideous dress.... and then when she wants the valentino back and is bruttally rebuffed the pawn shop lady goes 
"its not my fault you don't know how much a Valentino is worth" 
HAHAHAHAHAHA. I don't know why that line always stuck w/ me as one of the snottiest/funniest things ever. Well, let's be serious.. GG is one of my favorite shows so its not like I have to try hard to memorise something i've seen a million times and think is hilarious anyway..  MOVING ON... 


THIS is really something I shouldn't like because i'm not:

a) 10 years old
b) made of millions that I should be spending on useless trinkets.. (and in this case i'm not kidding)
c) a dude trying to tell his gf that he loves her (DAMMIT... I'M LIKE 5 MONTHS LATE ON TRYING TO GET THIS FROM A BOY)

but this concept is so cute.. Pomaletto used to have this brand as an exclusve thing but now commoners like myself can experience the joy of buying each little trinket which a different saying.. (and conveniently cost like 300+) to amke an individualized charm bracelette that costs no less than 1k!

There is a little penguin that means "crazy in love" and a horse that means "le's run away together" and a dolphin that means "i'll follow you anywhere" PLUS half of the proceeds goes to WWF. I really don't see a downside here. It;s like juicy's tacky charms but tasteful and somewhat meaningful.. I could easily spend like multiple thousands buying these things for my friends.


OKAY, thats all for now.


Saturday, March 16, 2013


OKAY, sooooooo


if improperly used you might become.. well.......Regina George- ESQUE

I found these rules on the blog YOUNG RICH AND FAKING IT and had to share them bc they are basically brilliant. hahahahah.

If only I could follow these daily I think I'd be good. Try to keep these brilliant rules in mind at all times and I swear your life will improve. Hell, you can probably even beat obesity.. I'm sure Kate puts these laws to use everyday of her life. OMG this is like a self- help entry. SWEET.

and obvi here is your inspirational mix that I worked on VERY hard to go perfectly. I poured my god damned heart and soul in it... So enjoy it!

The 49 Laws of Power:
  1. Never outshine the master.
  2. Never put too much trust in friends; learn how to use enemies.
  3. Amidst the Turmoil of Events, Do Not Lose Your Presence of Mind.
  4. Always say less than necessary.
  5. Create a Sense of Urgency and Desperation: The Death-Ground Strategy.
  6. Court attention at all costs.
  7. Get others to do the work for you, but always take the credit.
  8. Make other people come to you; use bait if necessary.
  9. Win through your actions, never through argument.
  10. Infection: avoid the unhappy and unlucky.
  11. Learn to keep people dependent on you.
  12. Use selective honesty and generosity to disarm your victim.
  13. When asking for help, appeal to people’s self-interests, never to their mercy.
  14. Pose as a friend, work as a spy.
  15. Crush your enemy totally.
  16. Use absence to increase respect and honor.
  17. Keep others in suspended terror: cultivate an air of unpredictability.
  18. Do not build fortresses to protect yourself. Isolation is dangerous.
  19. Know who you’re dealing with; do not offend the wrong person.
  20. Do not commit to anyone.
  21. Play a sucker to catch a sucker: play dumber than your mark.
  22. Use the surrender tactic: transform weakness into power.
  23. Concentrate your forces.
  24. Play the perfect courtier.
  25. Re-create yourself.
  26. Keep your hands clean.
  27. Play on people’s need to believe to create a cultlike following.
  28. Enter action with boldness.
  29. Plan all the way to the end.
  30. Make your accomplishments seem effortless.
  31. Control the options: get others to play with the cards you deal.
  32. Play to people’s fantasies.
  33. Discover each man’s thumbscrew.
  34. Be royal in your fashion: act like a king to be treated like one.
  35. Master the art of timing.
  36. Disdain things you cannot have: Ignoring them is the best revenge.
  37. Create compelling spectacles.
  38. Think as you like but behave like others.
  39. Stir up waters to catch fish.
  40. Despise the free lunch.
  41. Avoid stepping into a great man’s shoes.
  42. Strike the shepherd and the sheep will scatter.
  43. Work on the hearts and minds of others.
  44. Disarm and infuriate with the mirror effect.
  45. Preach the need for change, but never reform too much at once.
  46. Never appear perfect.
  47. Do not go past the mark you aimed for; in victory, learn when to stop.
  48. Assume formlessness.
  49. Don't be a lame hipster bitch from bk hahahaahahahahah

Friday, March 15, 2013

THE SEX KITTEN HALL OF FAME: top 10 sex symbols through the decades

 TODAYS MIXTAPE: He's almost TOO good looking

ps. i spent a lot of time and energy making this mixtape the best fucking thing ever. so enjoy it. or you can learn this to eradicate yourself from any false knowledge.

The dictionary describes a Sex Kitten as: a term that typically refers to a woman who exhibits a sexually provocative lifestyle or an abundant sexual aggression. 

I felt these ladies embodied that spirit over the century. And are known for it. 

Obviously the list might be a little biased but I refrained from putting Kate on it or any of the fab 5.. They are their own thing. These girls are known for driving men INSANE. 

and so here we go:


1. Ciara Bow 

You know how much I love an "it girl" and this one seems to fit the description perfectly.. well, all flappers seem to. Ciara rose to stardom in the silent film era of the 1920s. She was the ideal flapper, with short skirt, small breasts, and bobby hair. She was basically what I want to be

She made the movie “It” with its original title “SEX” that would never have made it through the sensors back in the olden days of the 1920's. In another of her movies called “Down to the Sea in Ships”, the actress attempted to overcome her youthful looks so she put her hair up and wore a dress she “sneaked” from her mother. (omg.. but i think that was a big deal) She also prepares for her date with the boss, in a scene where her girlfriend trying hard to assist her uses a pair of scissors to modify her dress in order to look more "sexy". In the 20's I think that was a little taboo. But who knows. Sounds like a normal night getting ready to go out to me. hahahahahahah

She the turned singer and was the subject of wild rumors regarding her sex life. She was accused of exhibitionism, incest, drug addiction, and lesbianism by a tabloid called The Coast Reporter. She was blackmailed to give $25,000 to cease printing the stories. Bow was rumored to swing with entire members the 1927 University of Southern California football team. (yum.. Marc Sanchez and Reggie Bush) Unfortunately she became addicted to drugs, got fat and went kinda crazy. SHIT SUCKS. 

2. Jean Harlow

There is something about Jean Harlow that is crazy hot. Maybe its her bleach blonde hair. You know i'm a sucker for blondes. Anyway, she ran away from home at the age of 16 to marry the 23 year old Charles McGrew which is pretty hot in itself...  They moved to Los Angeles, where she got small parts in movies but made it big in one of Howard Hugh's films. 
SIDENOTE: I think she was played by Gwen Stephanie in the Aviator..I'm so not a Gwen Stephanie fan. I think its bc I hate male bands w/ a female singer. Maybe I just always hated No Doubt. 
 She and McGrew divorced in 1930, and two years later she married screenwriter Paul Bern.  He committed suicide just two years later. (and I think breakups are bad) In 1933 she married Harold Rosson, but they divorced only six months later. This is getting good!!! Getting married multiple times is seriously the way to go.. as long as you're not marrying some poor nobody. 

Some ppl call her the original blonde bombshell, and Harlow was not afraid of her overt sexuality, posing nude at only 17 years old (hell yea, that's when you have to do it).  She is also rumored to never wear underwear and sleep in the nude. Neither of these are a big deal.. but I guess they were back then. Whatevs. shes hot. 


3. Mae West

I'm sure most everyone in the world knows Mae West's story but seriously.. I could not have made this list and left her off it. 

So, Mae made her name for herself on the stage in New York. West was one of many controversial movie stars of her day, encountering numerous problems including censorship. West served 10 days in jail for her performance her first play “Sex” on Broadway. 

Her following play "The Drag" was also about homosexuality. "Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me" is one of her many famous quotes. Daring ‘30s star Mae West, who will mostly be remembered for her naughty quotes "Is that a pistol in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me" and "I remember our date and have the splinters to prove it,” penned three plays all revolving around sexuality. 

The first was simply titled Sex, which ran on Broadway for a couple of weeks before being axed for indecency. Mae’s second production was called The Drag (about gay men) and her final attempt was The Pleasure Man. The last two were quickly banned from Broadway. Fucking awesome. She also wore furs like exclusively and dressed like a female pimp in my opinion. NICE. 


4. Rita Hayworth

Rita Hayworth's actual life was kinda boring but again, there is no way I couldn't keep this historical off the list. Shes super famous because she was THE pin up girl during WWII.

Shes best known for her sultry portrayal of Gilda, or her innate glamor who does that hair flip thing when some dude asks if she's decent... "Who, me????" I have to do that at some point in my life. HAHAHAHAH.You have to say... you want to be her during that point. I read somewhere that Gilda's over the top character was nothing like Hayworth in real life.. oh well, who cares, it is all pretend anyway. 

She also gets points for getting divorced FIVE fucking times and dancing w/ Fred Aistaire. She gets a shout out in Madonna's Vogue and which is rad too. I love that song. Like thats original. 


5. Marilyn 

This one is  obvious.. but also obviously she had to be on the list. (that is becoming kinda a trend here) It’s a shame that loving Marilyn Monroe has become something of a cliché, because she truly was a one of a kind. 

In true sex kitten form, she once said, “sex is a part of nature.  I go along with nature.”  She was unabashedly sexy, tortured, and the ultimate damsel in distress. I mean fuck.. she oDed. 

Here are some things you might not know about her: Hugh Hefner already has his grave picked out and it is in LA right next to Marilyn's who happened to be on the first cover of playboy. . I wonder how happy she is about that. I bet she wanted to be buried next to Bobby. 

Andy famously made multiple multiple screen prints of Marilyn. Andy viewed celebrity as a sort of new form of god, worshiped by their fans. and some argue that the mass produced images Marilyn as a commentary on how people will do anything to get their celebrity fix. His many alterations and distortions of the portrait is what he felt mass media did to all people. He used his painting as a sort of tell all on the dark side of celebrity. But I think Andy just extorts everyone so who knows about that... and had a sick talent i want called "making everybody love me"

monsieur de congratulations. asshole. 

6. Raquel Welsh
People rarely know tht before Raquel Welsh is like the pin up of all pin ups (wait.. wasn't that Rita Hayworth?) she was a newscaster. HAHAHAHAHAHAH. Female newscasters from the 70's remind me of anchorman. I'm such a blonde.  

But seriously,  Hell, I want a pin up of her if only because its like the most iconic thing ever.. altho it does remind me a little bit of star wars or something which I am NOT into.. After she wore that little fur bikini as Barbarella (which btw was the weirdest movie ever.. i'm sorry I know its a cult classic but... WTF???) men went crazy over her. I mean, yea those legs....She's gorgeous, why am I hating?  

But besides that being a legendary beauty/sex symbol  her life reads kinda like a boring book assigned to you in high school.. (read: Shakespeare.. no offense to you nerds that like to sit down w/ a good read like Henry the VIII)


7. Bridget Bardot

This bitch is like SERIOUSLY the ultimate sex kitten. Good god. Another Pin up (I guess that was like what dudes masturbated to back in the day.. seems weird) dudes didn't know a whole lot about her because she was French and the number of cultured men in America is like almost negative now.. i'm assuming it was also dwindling then. 

But her sex kitten persona and the interest shown in by American men out does almost anyone else on this list... maybe.. okay thats debateable.  I read one account of this boy who said "My mom says it was like the boys in school had never seen a girl before."  She was French, exotic, sexy, and adorable all at the same time.  

She was in some American movies, but her modeling and pin-ups were far more popular.  Even her poorly-dubbed French films that aired in the US were popular and you know a dude has to be super into a hot actress to watch a foreign film. UGH.  American men simply couldn’t get enough of her. I can't either. She reminds me of Lara Stone a little. I guess beauty repeats itself. I wonder if she would get the Calvin Klien ad campaign. 

8. Farrah Faucet

Charlie's Angel, red bikini.. thats all. Not only was she super hot too.. but she was also married to the Six Million Dollar Man, Steve Austin (Lee Majors).  That was major street cred back in the day (so I read) so hell yea for that..  

Also, after doing a little research.. people with feet fetishes are obsessed w. her feet. hmm... Interesting and disgusting.


I'm skipping the 80's bc I don't feel like writing about Madonna. Go research her yourself. 


9. Pamela Anderson
OMG first of you remember when Pam Anderson was on Home Improvement? TOOL TIME. hahahah that shit is hilarious.

Anyway, i"m not sure the timeline of her boob jobs but I know she had some work done by her Playboy debut in 1989 (and continued to make hte cover until something like 2008). I wonder if she slept w/ Hef. I think she was the face of Guess for a little too. 

Besides being like oozing sex in an almost awkward way.. she cemented herself in the sex kitten hall of fame for her sextape w/ Tommy Lee which I am kinda pissed that I"ve never seen.  Stating the obvious here: but she was also famous for shaking her titties in that red bikini in Baywatch.. but I never saw that show so I don't have much to say abt that. I feel like it was a show for boys my age to watch and jerk off to after school. SICK. They get all these hot guys and we get whats his name.. that hairy dude who sucks. 

10. Kate Upton
I was on the fence about this one but I figured If you get two Sports Illustrated covers in a row you've got something going on.

She kinda reminds me of the 1970's blonde supermodels who were all California blondes and not especially skinny.. like Laura Hutton before Gia came along and changed everything. Honestly, I'm not that into her so I"ll leave you w/ this cute little move that she did. How middle America:

OKAY. and to finish off here's an article on whether or not you're a sex kitten yourself that I found on HAHAHAH beware, you might be surprised by the results: Do you like having sex more than you like falling in love?



Wednesday, March 13, 2013

I'M SEXY AND I KNOW IT: Anita Rhea Tepp

Okay is this is going to be my first attempt at interviewing someone. Yes, its totally random but I mean, so it this whole damn blog.

The life and times of a muse: Rhea Tepp

Rhea Tepp and I went to high school in
Seattle but she currently lives in LA in what I would fondly refer to a bohemian lifestyle.

Basically if we lived in the 60’s I would consider her and her merry band of friends would all be full fledged hippies (not unlike her parents, her mother was a groupie and fucked Joe Cocker and her father lived in a nudist colony for a considerable amount of time.. Stories I always loved to hear when I came over.. mostly bc of how much they embarrassed Rhea)

I took some time during a recent phone call to ask her a few questions about her life and other random shit since I felt like playing the part of a reporter and I think i'd be an awesome employee for INTERVIEW Magazine.. (note how I used the Interview w/ Kate and Naomi on it.. plus if you're a boy you get to see boobies. AHAHAHA) Anyway, You know INTERVIEW has been waiting to hire a girl like me!! So I thought I'd figure out if I had any natural talent stored away.

I knew Rhea was the perfect interviewee for my first attempt since she doesn’t give a shit and hopefully wouldn’t judge me since we basically grew into sisters during our high school years. (if she is reading this she is probably thinking to herself: “No, I judged you”)

A little more about our fascinating subject at hand: she grew up in Seattle and has two deceased cats named Julia and Bruce and a younger brother who has the hottest friend of all history. Hahahaha that’s an exaggeration.

But seriously, hes total marriage material. Yale graduate, Law school, everything. YUM. Rhea and I are totally different but were able to bond over similar attitudes towards life over stolen liquor from our parents liquor cabinets while too young to know what we were really talking about. It was all very deep.


First I asked her about how she likes living in LA which lead us into a conversation about why people are so quick to hate on LA. (I told her about the SNL skit the Californian’s which she had never heard of… but then again she has a life and who watches SNL unless they are in a doomed relationship and sit around on a Saturday night w/ their shitty boyfriend watching NBC? Answer: me)

hahahahaha altho its still so fucking funny. OMG HAHAHAHA.

Rhea: I feel that NoCal and the Pacific Northwest are major haters of LA and NYC is too (yes, she was definitely right on w/ that) but SoCal doesn’t have a reversal hate towards any of these places so I don’t understand why we are the victims here, unless people are jealous. Maybe NYC, but NYC hates LA more for some reason. 
Me: Maybe because Biggie died there.. we may never know.
Rhea: people living in SoCal are so busy defending their city from all the haters that there is really no time to hate any other places so I don’t really have any negative feelings towards any places: including Canada. (Thank You! WHY DOES EVERYONE HATE CANADA???everyone is a bunch of fascists!)

I went on to ask Rhea some questions that I hoped would spark a bit more interesting conversation but nothing seemed to get any theoretical balls rolling.
Me: If you had $10,000 given to you what would you do?
Rhea: pay my rent
* YAWN* come on... give me SOMETHING to work with here
Me: Do you have a favorite food?
Rhea: Thai and Indian
Me: What are your favorite dishes from those cuisines?
Rhea: Medium Spicy Pad Thai and Aloo Saag.. and Naan.

Me: Is there a food you enjoy cooking/making?
Rhea: Sandwiches
Really???? I was going to have to start making up answers here... 
Me: Is there a certain sandwich that you specialize in?
Rhea: No. All sandwiches
I guess she is just your average girl at heart who prefers mainstream ethnic dishes, enjoys making any type of sandwiches and needs to get her rent paid.... hmm. let's dig deeper

I moved on to the topic of her tattoos since she is working on a sleeve currently and let’s her housemates practice on her when needed. This unfortunately didn’t get me much further in terms of thought-provoking answers or discussions:

Me: That is very exciting you are working on a sleeve. Is there going to be a theme?
Rhea: No
 Me: Do you have a favorite Tattoo? 
Rhea: that is too hard to answer.
Well, that answers that. 

This interview was pretty much ready to kill us both with boredom which wasn’t what I expected from one of the funniest girls in my arsenal of girlfriends. I’ll leave it up to myself here to give Rhea a wall of praise (and no, not for her interviewing skills)

She has one of the most beautiful voices I’ve ever heard. Seriously, i'm not just saying that. I'm hiring her to sing in my wedding.. when that happens.. IT WILL!! She’s in like a million bands.. or has been  but her most recent music can be found here:

She also organized the first LA Zine Fest ever which is pretty fucking awesome. I don't know a lot about zines and I don't even know if  I believe in the concept of a zine but whatever they are.. Rhea took it upon herself to single handily (almost) put together and run LA's first festival for these personalized homemade mini magazines with pictures.

Rhea explained to me that this blog in print with some pictures would be considered a zine.. to which I was surprised since this blog is pretty ridiculous.... But when have my opinions mattered? She got into zines when she was 19 and was hooked. Kinda like I was hooked on Edie when I discovered she existed..

What is even cooler.. the XGames covered the Zine Fest!!! See vidie below.

AND.. just when things couldn't get better for Rhea's zine carreer she was asked to attend coachella fully paid to teach a zine workshop. I'm very seriously considering going to see her!!! I've ALWAYS wanted to go to coachella!!.. and of course I would steal her backstage passes.. AND celebrity watch! I just loked at the lineup and they just added BLUR. YUM I've alwyas had a thing for liam gallagher since i was a wee pre pubescent girl. hahaha.

Maybe i'll even take a zine making class at the workshop.. where i will learn to use a printer and print this blog out. maybe in color. hahaha or i'll just make my own drawings that go w. every post. That sounds better.

If you have interest in zines including what they are and why you should care about them contact ms. Zine @ is  or You might even get to meet her and her sexy self. 


I'm not sure if 'm ready for interview yet.. but perhaps i'll keep trying... one day.

Elizabeth Spencer-Green
Elizabeth Spencer-Green and Rhea Anita Tepp
Anyway Rhea and I are definitely two very different peas in a pod. I"m pretty sure my most hipster-fied outfit/music would be considered a mainstream waste of time and money to her.. (which it would be) and I love that because as you know, hipsters are the bane of my existence. But as long as we can continue to get along while I spend too much money on clothing and enjoy mainstream pop music and while at the same time she runs a radio station out of her living room (where her band also holds impromptu concerts) and creates independent local festivals in the DIY culture of LA I'm more that psyched.. and I'll add that I DID give her her first Pixies CD back in 199? :)



OH and here is your mix for today. I felt like a little brit rock after talking about BLUR.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

Ode to Edie Sedgwick and Effy Stonem

Effie + Edie + Lana = LOVE

I totally procrastinated today andmade this vidie to one of my new favorite songs. I feel like Effie Stonem is a mini Edie.. even tho shes a fictional character.. I'm cool.

“Sometimes I think I was born backwards. You know, come out my mum the wrong way. I hear words go past me backwards. The people I should love, I hate. And the people I hate…”
- Effy Stonem 

"I think something very weird's going on now, 'cause the power that is permitted to youth is quite extraordinary. And they are sort of run by that kind of power."
- Edie Sedgwick

"This is what makes us girls
We all look for heaven and we put our love first
Somethin' that we'd die for, it's our curse
Don't cry about it, don't cry about it
This is what makes us girls
We don't stick together 'cause we put our love first
Don't cry about him, don't cry about him
It's all gonna happen"
- Lana Del Rey

Enjoy mes cheries.

and P.S. If this depressed you, you might need a little pick me up of girlie pop music. Don't forget cheesy best friend musc is always at your fingertips. : PLAY ME
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